Distractions

First and foremost, I've been awfully distracted lately.

Throughout my short secondary life, I've encountered various phrases that either helped me or broke me. More on the latter than the former. Hey, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? But one of those phrases would be this; "You're distracted."

It's true. I was distracted. However, I didn't like how people use that word. I've realized that people would use that word when they don't agree or rather dislike what you are doing. It becomes so apparent nowadays that I would think long and hard about it while showering.

Example:

That girl is so focused in music
That girl is so distracted in music.

And then it hit me. Most of the people around me would say you're distracted when I go out and see the world. What if I'm not? What if I am focused? And to those who you consider focused, there is a possibility they are truly distracted?

Being focused means you know what you want and you give your all in it. Being distracted is not knowing what you want and blindly doing it. Or in this case, doing something what society does not want you to do.

I'll admit. I'm distracted. I don't know yet what I truly what I want in life All I can make up is these vague images that may or may not make me happy in the end. And the sad part is, even when I feel that I have a solid goal in my life to work onto, I can't help but feel and question whether that is the right path to take.

Mark Twain once said that the two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. 

However, I do not want to become 'nothing' by default to my insecurities or rather trepidation of the unknown. What's worse than regretting of doing something is regretting not to.

So here is my conclusion. I should be focused on what I plan to do. But there is a possibility that the thing might not make me happy. But that's okay. Because it's better than not becoming anything. Because not becoming anything would certainly, without a doubt, would make me unhappy.